Coffin Conversations - by dementia

Lobsters, be free!

A group of clawed crustaceans made a break for it in Germany, hightailing it from a Stuttgart restaurant.

They had squeezed through gaps in their cages and scampered out the door.

They were caught and resentenced to death by boiling after an astonished pedestrian spotted them.

Addiction is a cruel mistress.

A Wisconsin man told police he couldn't stop himself from guzzling seven hard lemonades he took from the shelf at a Wal-Mart because he's an alcoholic. He then put the empties back on the shelf.


He had been sober for 16 months and fell off the wagon while shopping with his wife.

"He stated that he was upset he broke his 16-month streak and that he didn't know how he was going to tell his wife," said Mukwonago Police Chief Fred Winchowky.

A 30-year-old Russian man became his own step-grandfather after marrying his 79-year-old granny. Clerks in the town of Vladimir neglected to check whether the bride and groom were related. Authorities have since annulled the nuptials, and prosecutors are considering pressing charges.